Could you grab me a large black coffee?

You know, it’s funny how a small, recurring thing can really start to get to you. For me, it’s the Tuesday morning coffee run.

Every Tuesday, like clockwork, a few people from my department head down to that amazing little artisan coffee shop a block away. You can always tell when they’re about to go because there’s this buzz of activity—keys jangling, wallets being pulled out, and that familiar question, “Okay, who needs a caffeine fix?”

They always make a big group order to save trips. Someone will take charge, holding up their phone and calling out, “Alright, messaging the group chat! Last call for orders!” And everyone will crowd around, shouting out their complicated lattes and cold brews.

But they never send that message to the group chat *I’m in*. They have a separate one, just for them. I sit right there, at the desk next to the huddle, and I can hear the whole thing. Sometimes, I’ll even make eye contact with someone, and I’ll give a small, hopeful smile, thinking maybe this time… but then they just look away.

I’ve even tried the direct approach a couple of times. I’ll say, “Oh, if you’re going to ‘The Daily Grind,’ could you grab me a large black coffee?” The first time I did it, there was this awkward pause, and then Sommer said, “Oh, we’re actually just going for a quick walk, not really doing orders today.” But then I saw them come back twenty minutes later, each carrying a carrier full of drinks.

So now, on Tuesdays, I’ve started to just put my headphones in when I see them gathering. I pretend to be super engrossed in an email, but really, I’m just trying to block out the sound of them planning without me. I’ll get my own coffee later, alone, from the mediocre machine in the breakroom.

It’s such a small thing, a coffee run. But it happens every single week, and each time it’s a tiny reminder that I’m not part of the inner circle. I just wish, for once, someone would turn to me and say, “Hey, we’re doing a coffee run. Want us to grab you something?” It would make my whole Tuesday, honestly.